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Tara stared at the reflection in the mirror. What did one wear to a fetish fair? It was the thought that had plagued her for days. Ever since Josh asked her to the damned thing. It was not a club like Rainbows after all. Although there would be an after-party that was similar, they would not be staying for that. Josh had to go out of town for a few days on business. So he had to get up early to be at the airport. No, they were going with a very specific purpose in mind. Josh wanted to buy her some toys. Sex toys.
She shook her head once more at the woman in the mirror. “What are you doing?” she asked. “The man is only five years older than your daughter for goodness sake.” But that fact had not kept her from having phone sex with him almost every night for the past two weeks. Ending each night begging me for permission to come.
He too had been shocked at the age difference. He had not thought her much older than his own twenty-eight. Certainly not the almost two decades that separated them. That fed her mortally wounded ego as much as the dozens, if not hundreds, of texts he sent each day and the naughty phone calls they shared each night.
But that was it…their phone calls were not strictly naughty. They always began just as they had with friendly banter. It was nice having someone genuinely interested in how her day had been. And she too was genuinely interested in Josh’s work as a computer geek…although she understood completely nothing of it.
Yet it only took them moments of chatting and catching up before the conversation turned to other things. Usually how wet was her pussy. From their it was a constant barrage of commands. Touch herself for him. Pinch her nipples.
He of course was disappointed that she did not have a vibrator or dildo to use on herself as he listened on the other end of the phone. But in the two years since she had been separated from her ex-husband, she had used her fingers exclusively to rub her clitoris…on those rare occasions when one of her sexy erotic romance books got her too hot.
She was almost certain that she had never come so much in her life as she did these past couple of weeks. She had just assumed that she was frigid, had a lower than average sex drive, did not like sex. It was what her husband had always accused her of anyway. So she was more than happy to discover the tigress hidden so deeply inside of her.
Of course, it had been easy so far. Nothing more than phone sex. In the dark. Beneath the covers. Alone even. Josh had been super busy at work. His company was writing a new app that would be launched this week. As senior programmer, it was his job to be at the clients offices when that happened in case something went wrong. So he had had no time to meet up. It did not help that he lived clear across the city. Over an hour away in fact.
Tara looked critically at the woman in the mirror once more. She had finally settled on a shortish sun dress. Her shoulders were bare and the deep V neckline accentuated her full breasts. The hem fell to mid-thigh and likewise showcased her legs, which were probably her best feature. Women half her age would kill for their shapely, firmness.
But the dress also did all it or any garment could to hide her greatest flaw. She pulled it tight across the soft roundness of her belly. The evidence of her child bearing that had so fascinated the Flemish baroque painter Peter Paul Rubens was clear in its roundness. She laughed sardonically. Four hundred years ago her Rubensque beauty might have made her one of his favorite subjects, but in the twenty-first century it was thin and young which took the day.
She fought back images of the young Sunday school teacher that ensnared her ex-husband into sin. Although inn her more honest moments, she recognized that it was he who abused his power as pastor to entice the younger woman. It also called into question so many other things about her twenty year marriage to the man.
But she did not have time this morning for any of those morbid thoughts. Josh would be here any moment. Then it was off to the fetish fair. She chuckled: how ironic that the former preachers’ daughter and wife was spending a sunny Sunday afternoon looking at whips, collars and all other manner of naughty toys.
She sighed. No, there would be plenty of time to indulge her doubts and insecurities later. Josh would be gone for the next two weeks. Their near constant communication curtailed to a good morning text and a late night phone call as he dealt with the demands of his job. She had already decided that güvenilir canlı bahis siteleri she would use that time to catch up on her own work, the pile of sewing orders that seemed to grow larger with each passing day. She would also use the time wisely to examine this odd friendship and where it was going.
Where was it going? She was not sure herself. Although she had fallen into the trap of just mindlessly obeying that commanding tone that still surprised her given her lover’s boyish cuteness and youth, she did not know where she stood with him. There had been no mention of exclusivity or her becoming his sub. Her relationship status on the social networking site remained…single.
It was a subject that she had discussed with Peter adnauseum. As her mentor, he had encouraged her to consider her position. Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free, he said. Butt still she had continued the clandestine phone calls with the young man. Their friendship growing with every passing day.
The ring of the door bell interrupted her musings just in time. She gave herself a final quick glance in the mirror. Whether she liked what she saw or not, it would have to do. She picked up the small purse that lay at the foot of the bed and practically ran down the stairs.
She smiled as she threw open the door of her apartment. Josh stood there. His shoulders slightly stooped, his head down a bit, with that boyish grin on his face. Here was the man that she had talked to for hours at the club. Not at all the commanding presence that haunted her dreams long after they had hung up the phone. The duality confused her as much as anything.
And confused she was in that moment. The uncertainty of her status hit her full on then. Did she kiss this man to whom she begged for sexual release every night for the past two weeks? Dropping to her knees to kneel supine seemed ridiculous here where any of her neighbors could see. Of course, shaking hands seemed just as silly given the way she begged and pleaded with ‘Sir’ for her orgasms. In the end, she went with a brief hug.
It seemed the right choice as he smiled and returned the embrace. “I am really sorry that we don’t have time to go to lunch or stay for the after party,” he almost stuttered. She shook her head and reassured him that she understood as he led her to his car parked on the street. She sighed a bit, reassured somehow when he laced his fingers through hers. The gentlemanly way that he opened the car door for her brought a smile to her face.
The fetish fair was only a twenty minute drive to a bar not far from her home. Most of the time, it served as a biker hang out with pool tables and a real old fashioned juke box. But one Sunday afternoon each moth its pool tables where pushed aside and it was transformed into a kinky ‘flea market’ of sorts. Although she had difficulty picturing such a thing.
The conversation was easy flowing as most of theirs were. Josh told her about the demands of new app. It was his biggest since joining this company eight months ago. After his fiancée broke their engagement, he had started over in the city. A new job, new apartment, everything. She supposed it was another thing they had in common.
The parking lot was packed as they drove up. At least three dozen cars, motorcycles and trucks lined the pavement. “You get out here by the door while I drive around to find a place. Wait by the door.”
Tara’s eyes widened. There was that voice. The command was clear. Her throat tightened as she looked across the car at him. Even his face had changed. There was something harder; gone was the boy. In his place was a man, a stranger. She swallowed back her confusion, “Yes, Sir.”
Her mind raced even as she obeyed him. Where had that come from? How could he just switch it on like that? From casual conversation about work and the new city to full on Dom inn the blink of an eye. Was it this place? And more importantly, how did she feel about it? Was she going to just obey everything that he said? Without any negotiation? Without even knowing where she stood with the man?
She chuckled as she watched him pick his way across the parking lot. His black jeans and shirt seemed distinctly out of place in this world of leather vests and chaps. Then again he seemed as out of place here as she felt. Maybe that was it…maybe his Doctor Jekyll and Mister Hyde was what she needed. Maybe she could so easily submit to Mister Hyde because of the intelligence and sincerity of Doctor Jekyll? Yet another idea to discuss with Peter.
He smiled güvenilir illegal bahis siteleri as he placed his hand at the small of her back, guiding her into the darkness of the bar. They paused inside, waiting in line to pay the cover charge. It gave her eyes time to adjust to the lower light. She looked around at the two dozen or so tables and stands that filled half of the bar. They seemed to be filled to capacity with everything from leather pants and skirts to a table full of those dastardly violet wands. People packed the floor between the stalls, waiting their turns to pay for purchases or ask questions.
She was relieved to note that she and Josh were not the only ones dressed down. The room was packed with an array of people just as Rainbows had been. Some of them dressed even more casually in jeans and t-shirts. Others dressed from head to toe in leather. A couple were even walking around in nothing more than thongs and collars…both female and male. One or two wore diapers. Hell, if she was not mistaken one was wearing a pair of leather chaps…with his bits on full display. She definitely was not in Kansas anymore, she chuckled.
Josh paid their entrance fees then took her by the elbow, guiding her protectively through the crowd. He seemed to almost know where they were going. She stared as they passed the table that was chock a block full of small wooden and velvet-lined boxes with wires and dials. A small man smiled secretively as he explained the item to the people gathered about his stand. She shivered as she heard the whine of the machine. The man held the glass wand in one hand as he ran it across the back of the other. He did not even flinch. Let alone cry out as Beth had with Master Watts. She shook her head…yet another thing to confuse her about this world.
“Here we are,” came that voice again. Tara looked up to see a stall lined with a surprisingly large selection of sex toys. Not that she knew overly much about them. Of course, she had read in some of her racier e-books about dildos, vibrators and even the shiny rubbery cones that she suspected were butt plugs. But she had never been to a sex shop, held one, let alone owned any of them.
Until Josh, her fingers had been sufficient to get her by on those occasions when she needed to relieve her sexual tensions by taking matters into her own hands as it were. She fought back that same panic that had almost made her in run in fear from Rainbows that first night. She still might not know whether or not she belonged in these places, this world, but as Peter would say the only way to find out was to stay and see things through.
She sighed as she released the tension in her body and nodded to Josh silently. She watched him as he picked up several dildos, hefting them as if taking measure of their weight and size. “Come here, Tara,” he crooned as her tummy dropped to her knees again. She had no choice but to obey.
“How large was your husband?”
Her eyes flew wide with the intimacy of such a question. And in such a public place as well. She stammered for a moment, trying to figure out an appropriate response. “Ave-rrage, I suppose,” she stuttered as she turned a red shade of pink.
He frowned as he laid back the largest of them. Its shiny blackness frightened her as much as its sheer size. It was almost as big as her forearm. There was no way that thing could fit into anyone.
“Why are you surprised? You have had kids. You should know just how much a cunt can stretch,” he chuckled.
Tara shifted nervously from foot to foot. While she recognized the logic of his words, the casual way that he used that word, cunt, both revolted and excited her. She had been raised to call them girl and boy parts…if you absolutely had to call them anything at all. At school she had learned their proper names: vagina and penis. Of course, her spicy books that had become her addiction and had opened this Pandora’s box, this slippery slope to hell, used other words. Cock, pussy maybe. But sometimes colloquial terms like manhood, channel, even womanly softness. She tried to even think of when she had actually heard or read that term but she could not remember, although she must have at some point if she knew its meaning.
She watched as Josh picked up an odd shaped plastic package. Its contents was even more unusual looking. It was shaped like a dildo, well like a cock to be exact, but thankfully it was not as large as the one that he had laid down. It was encased in the same shiny rubber that the other one had been made of but it seemed more firm. güvenilir bahis şirketleri And unlike the other one that had a pair of testicle shaped things at its base, this one had an actual handle with an array of buttons. But the most unusual thing about it was the odd shaped and much smaller phallus that jutted from its base just above the handle. It too was covered in the rubber but at the end it bifurcated into what looked for the world like…bunny ears.
“A rabbit,” they both said at the same time. Their eyes caught and they laughed. The tension abated…at last for the moment.
“I know you have not had any lovers in the past couple of years. And that you don’t own any toys either. So I’m guessing that even with loads of lube that thing,” his head tilted towards the black monster he had laid down earlier, “is not the best idea.”
She chuckled as she nodded. She watched as he bit his lower lip and his eyes rolled down to the side. He turned the same bright pink as she had when he used that word. She strained to hear as he finally spoke, “But I am a far sight bigger than ‘average’ too.”
Tara blanched and colored again. What would her former friends from church think if they heard this conversation, saw this place? As Peter would say…what judgment would her god pass? Except that she was no longer even certain that she believed in god. At least not the vengeful male of fire and brimstone that her father and husband had shouted about from the pulpit. Even if such a creature existed, she was tired of living in fear of him and his judgment. If she was going to burn in hell for all eternity, then she was going to make sure it was for far more pleasure than a few secret e-books and fantasies. If she was going to pay for her sins, she wanted to at least taste the sweetness of the apple.
When she came out of her own convoluted head to look back up at him, the embarrassed and shy boy was gone once more. In his place stood that man. “While I am gone, I expect you to use this every night,” that voice caressed her into a jumble of raw emotions. She nodded her head. “What do you say?”
She cast her eyes down to the floor. She knew what he wanted to hear. What he had heard dozens or perhaps even a hundred or more times on the phone. But this was different. This was more real somehow. Face to face. In this place. It was a more complete surrender to his will. One she was not sure she was ready to make yet.
Then her mind went back to her thoughts of just a moment before. She did want to taste that apple. She honestly did. And with that came the submission to him…to fate…to her needs that he craved. “Yes, Sir,” she whispered.
She was rewarded with a broad smile. It was an odd combination of that boyish grin and sin itself. “Good girl,” that voice floated from somewhere as he turned back to the vendor and handed her the package.
Tara was left to look around the dark confines of the building as he finalized the purchases, paid and took the surprisingly large brown paper bag from the woman. Once more she was struck by how ordinary most of the people were. Sure there were a handful of super models…both male and female. But most of the crowd were average…or older or like her had a few extra pounds. There were also a surprising contingent of geeks and nerds just like Josh. It was a marked deviation from the fantasy world spun by words on a screen.
She wondered…had any of those authors ever been to a place like this? Had they ever tried any of the things that they wrote about, that she had witnessed at Rainbows? Had they ever felt those odd butterflies in the pit of their stomachs, the tingles at the sound of that voice? Did they know the power of those words…’Yes, Sir’ and ‘Good girl’?
Josh took her elbow once more and led her back through the crowded room. They took the ride home in silence. Both seemed lost in their internal battles. Tara longed to spill hers as much as she longed to know his. But she was reminded of just how uncertain this thing between them truly was.
He walked her to her door but refused her offer of coffee. She nodded her head even though she really did not understand. She was not certain what she even felt as he passed her the bag. She was not certain what to say either. In the end, she settled for “Thank you, Josh.”
He smiled then. The little boy. “You’re welcome.”
Then he did something that truly shocked her. He drew her gently into his arms and kissed her. His lips were soft but firm. They brushed like butterflies back and forth across hers until she relaxed into his embrace. Then just when the tingles of sexual awareness burst through her, he drew back with that other smile. The knowing one. “I will call you later, baby girl. You are not to open the bag until I do.”
Then he was gone. Leaving her as alone and confused as she had been…for forever it seemed.
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